


Something wrong

by fanetjuh



Category: Tanz der Vampire - Steinman/Kunze
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-16
Updated: 2013-01-16
Packaged: 2017-11-25 18:06:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/641566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanetjuh/pseuds/fanetjuh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After years of friendship Alfred discovers the girl that made him smile again is dying and he has to choose what to do. With Herbert having a small, but really important part in the story!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something wrong

Alfred knew something was wrong from the moment he saw her window open already. She never opened her window before he threw a few stones against it. She was far too scared that something bad would enter her room. He never told her he was something bad, but she never asked and she always let him in. She let him in so they could talk, or play computergames, or so she could just fall asleep knowing she was safe because he was there. She wasn’t safe with him around, but he never told her and she never asked.

He ran as fast as he could to her window and entered her room. She lied down in her bed, sweat all over her body and her knees almost pressed against her chin. Her beautiful blue blankets lied on the ground, as if she threw them there because she didn’t want them anymore. He knew what was wrong. She was having this long-disease for years and she knew she was going to die one day. She didn’t tell him it would be so soon. But he never asked.

He sat down next to her on the bed. “Sss…I’m here…it’s ok…” 

She turned around looked at him with glazy eyes. “Finally…” 

He knew he promised her to come earlier, but he had things to do in the castle and couldn’t go away without being missed. How could he have known that she would need him so badly? He looked at her long blonde curls, at her pretty blue eyes, at her perfectly white skin, at the painful smile on her lips. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to die so soon?” 

“Why didn’t you come earlier, like you promised?”

He kept silent and bend his head. His hand touched hers and he felt how warm she was. “I had…something to do…I tried to come, but they didn’t let me go and…well…they don’t know you exist…and I couldn’t tell them…” Of course he couldn’t tell them he was meeting a human girl for years already without even having a little taste. No-one would understand and everyone would just laugh, as if they didn’t that enough already because he was still not biting humans. Why should he take lives if there is enough bottled blood in the castle to survive? And of course he knew people died because of that bottles, but at least he didn’t need to kill them himself. 

“How…How do you feel?” 

She sighed and shook his head. He saw the pain in her eyes. “I’m perfectly fine…thanks…” 

He didn’t know if she wanted him to smile because of her joking or if she wanted him to feel sorry for asking. How long would she have before…he didn’t dare to think what was going to happen. He didn’t dare to think that she wouldn’t breath anymore, that her heart wouldn’t beat anymore, that she wouldn’t laugh anymore and that she wouldn’t try to teach him how a computer works anymore. He knew he was going to lose her some day, but not that it would be so soon.

He didn’t know what to say and he pressed his cold hand against her forehead, hoping it would work. 

“Thanks…” She said nothing and closed her eyes again. It was horrible to see her like this. He couldn’t remember her looking so terrible before. She always smiled, she had little lights in her eyes and although her coughing reminded him of her being ill, she never looked ill. Until now.

She sighed again and he knew that it wasn’t a good sign. Mostly if she sighed she was thinking about saying something she knew he didn’t want to hear. Mostly she did say it anyway. He waited and she sighed again, he guessed this was a heavy one. 

“Why don’t you help me?” He looked at her, surprised about the power in her voice. “Why don’t you save me?” 

“Save you?” 

She sighed again and turned around. Her coughing sounded horrible and he knew it hurt like hell. “Do you really think I didn’t notice?” Her voice sounded angry, a feeling he thought she couldn’t even have. 

“Notice what?” 

She sighed again and shook his head. “Alfred…your fangs…the fact that you’re always coming at night, the fact that you never eat or drink something, the fact that you always leave before sunrise. Do you really think I didn’t notice?” 

He looked away. She had known it all the time and he didn’t notice. Why had she never told him? But he never asked. 

She repeated her question. “Why don’t you save me?” 

He sighed. “I can’t…” He saw her eyes starting to cry and she pressed her lips together as if she didn’t want him to see she was crying. 

“Of course you can…” His hand touched her neck, hoping she would feel at least a bit better. “Just one bite…just one bite and I won’t die.” 

He sighed again and looked away. She really thought that just one bite was saving her? It was only the beginning of something worse. 

“I thought…” She turned around again and looked at him with eyes full of tears. “I thought you liked me…” 

“I do!” 

She smiled. “But you don’t like me enough to have me around you for eternity.” 

He shook his head. “You don’t know what you wish for…” She coughed again and he saw how much it hurt her. “Dying is part of living. It’s a great thing to be able to die…” 

It was her turn to shook her head. “I don’t understand…” 

He lied his hand on hers and felt so sorry for seeing her like this. “It’s ok to die. It’s the dying that makes your life a life. It’s the dying that gives everything that happened a meaning. Of course you’re far too young to die and of course I’ll miss you, but…I’m sure heaven waits for you.”

She coughed again and tried to swallow her tears. “I don’t want to go to heaven…I don’t want to die.” 

He pressed his hand against her cheek and tried to comfort her as much as he could. “It’s ok to be afraid.” 

“I’m not afraid…I’ve never been afraid for anything. I’m not afraid.” She paused a while to breath. He saw her fighting and he didn’t know how long he could bare to see this anymore. “I just…I just don’t want to go to heaven knowing that…” She paused again and he caressed her arm. 

“Knowing what?” 

She bend her head and her eyes tried to avoid his. “Knowing you’ll never come to accompany me.”

He kept silent, knowing she was right. Even if something would kill him, he would never see how heaven looks like. Vampires were not allowed in heaven, not even a vampire that wasn’t able to kill. “I’m sure there will be plenty of boys over there deserving you more than I do.” 

She shook her head. “I don’t want them…I want you…” 

He bend his head. “I can’t make you the monster I am. I can’t take away your right to belong in heaven. I can’t take away your life. It wouldn’t feel right.” 

With all the energy she still head she tried to raise. “Alfred! I’m dying!” 

“I know…” 

She looked confused. “Alfred…you’re…a vampire…you should have bitten me years ago.” 

“I had never planned to bite you.” He paused a while and both his hands touched her shoulders. “I’m a monster…I drink blood…because of me people are dying…I feel terrible about myself. I can’t make you the monster I am. It’s wrong to die so young, but it would be wrong to turn you into a monster instead of giving you the chance to turn your life into a life by dying.” He paused a while and looked at the pale white face from the little girl in the bed. “I can’t bite you, cause…I….” He felt the words coming, realizing she was the first girl after Sarah he used them for. “I love you.”

She nodded and he saw her crying. He wrapped his arms around her and tried to hold her as carefully as possible. How much time did she still have? Minutes? Hours? Days? 

“Alfred?” 

He looked at her asking eyes. “Yes?” 

“I don’t know how much time is left, but…” She paused as if she barely dare to ask him what she wanted to ask. 

“But?” 

“But…since you can’t stay with me when the sun rises…can you take me with you?” 

He hesitated, not knowing what she was actually asking. “What do you mean?” 

“I don’t want to die without you by my side…”

Her question confused him and he didn’t know how to react. “But…but what about your parents?” 

“I’ll leave them a note to tell them I’ll miss them.” 

“What about your friends?” 

“I already told them goodbye.” 

“And what about your body after…” He didn’t try to visualize how her body would look like without any life in it. 

“I don’t want a funeral…” 

He shook his head. “My home isn’t a safe place to die…” 

“You’re there…that’s all I want…” She knew he would give in if she kept on begging, he always did. “You can choose: You bite me or you take me with you to die with your arms around my body. There is no other option…” 

“I could just leave you right now and never come back…” 

“I don’t think you could…” 

He knew she was right. Of course he wouldn’t be able to leave her like this, he wouldn’t be able to leave her knowing she’ll hate him as much as she loved him, he wouldn’t be able to make her dying even worse as it already was. “Then write your note, cause I’m not going to bite you.” 

“Then give me paper and a pencil…”

He searched on her desk for some paper and a pencil and watched the girl writing her last note. She thanked her parents for all they had done for her, she thanked her parents for being there, for giving her all opportunities. And she told them goodbye, writing down she wanted to die in a certain place, with a certain person with her. He felt it was wrong to let her do so, but she was dying and this was her last wish. How could he not respect that?

“So, finished!” She looked at him as if she gained some new power. 

“We have to travel through the snow.” He grasped her blue blanket on the ground and looked at the girl, coughing and fighting the pain in her bed. “You shouldn’t travel at all…” 

“I’m dying anyway…” She was stubborn and selfish and she knew, but this was what she wanted and since he was going to let her die, she want it to happen her way. He smiled a painful smile and tried to cover her little body in the blanket. 

“Won’t I be to heavy?” 

He shook his head. “Sometimes being a vampire has it’s advantages.” He surrounded her body, covered in the blue blanket, with his arms and lifted her from the bed. “Are you sure?” 

“Yes.” 

“Well…then…let’s go…” He made sure the blanket was covering her and pressed her body against his chest. He felt her heart beating, he heard her lungs fighting for every bit of air she could get. He heard her coughing and he knew she was having pain. He had to remind himself that this was making her at least happy, cause it felt wrong to take her away from the room she belonged to. 

He jumped out of the window and ran as fast as he could to the castle. As if the Gods were with her, it was a winter night like there weren’t that many nights in Transylvania. It had stopped snowing and it didn’t feel as cold as it used to be. He couldn’t imagine there was one God liking her last wish, but he also didn’t believe that this all was just a coincidence. Maybe God after all wanted people to be happy, no matter with who or where. 

He ran true the winter night with the girl sleeping in his arms. He kept focusing on her breath and heartbeat to be sure she was still alive. Eventually he reached his room in the castle and he lied her down on his bed. He closed the window, to be sure no one would come in and no cold could grasp her. He lighted the fire and took the blanket away from her sweating body. He couldn’t believe she was still sweating after the travel trough the cold, but maybe this was what dying looked like.

It was strange to see her in his bed, her eyes following every movement he made. He didn’t know what to say to her. He just sat down beside her and hold her hand. Her eyes looked more peaceful than they looked at home. A smile made her face look happy. The only thing reminding him she was dying was her coughing, her sweating and her fighting for air. 

“Thank you…” Her lips found the courage to speak, but he heard how hard it was to say something. 

“It’s ok…you’re welcome.”

She curled herself up against his body and Alfred felt a bit uncomfortable. He really loved the girl and she was dying. He must have done something badly wrong that the Gods made him love someone who was dying so young. Or did he do something badly wrong by not giving her the opportunity to live forever? He shook his head and answered his own question. It’s a curse to live forever, not a blessing from the Gods.

“Alfred!” 

He recognized the voice yelling his name immediately, but before he could answer with a no the door opened and Herbert looked at the strange scene.

“What the hell is going on here?” 

Alfred ordered Herbert to close the door again and to be quiet. “She is dying…” 

Herbert looked at the girl and frowned his eyebrows. “I can see that…but why?” Herbert came a step closer and took a better look at the little girl Alfred was holding. 

“Because of a lung disease…” 

Herbert rolled his eyes and shook his head. “You…Stupid…Idiot!” Alfred tried to make Herbert calm down, but he didn’t succeed. “This is the girl making you smile the last years, isn’t she?” Alfred nodded. “Then why the hell do you let her die?” 

“You know that…” 

Herbert frowened his eyebrows again. “She asked you to let her die?” 

Alfred shook his head. “Of course not…” 

“Then I don’t understand.” 

“Come on! Herbert! Living a vampirelife! That’s no life! That’s worse than dying!” 

“You think it’s worse than dying! Looking at her I’m not sure anymore…” 

Her coughing sounded horrible. Alfred almost felt the pain she must be feeling right now and he tried to ignore it. “I simply can’t be so selfish to turn her into a vampire because that would make me happy.” 

“You’re selfish because you let her die so young!” Herbert paused for a second and his cold hand touched the body of the little girl. “You can give her eternity! You can give her happiness, a friend, someone to love.” He looked at Alfred. “You think you’re selfish because you’ll make her a monster, but think about what else she would gain if you gave her the chance to live.”

Alfred looked at the girl and whispered. “Get out of my room…now!” 

Herbert walked to the door but turned around a last time before leaving. “I’m not going to dry your tears for another hundred years. Not if it’s your own fault.” He closed the door behind him and Alfred looked again at the girl in his arms. Her heartbeat was weaker and her breathing became harder and harder. He knew she was going to die very soon. He had just a few minutes left to decide. 

She tried to open her eyes and looked at the boy holding her. “Please…” She whispered and felt the teardrops touching her cheeks. “Please…” She closed her eyes again, not being able to fight any longer. Alfred felt horrible. Whatever he did, it was always wrong. He felt her life in his arms grew weaker and weaker and suddenly he realized he was going to lose her. She wouldn’t talk to him anymore, she wouldn’t yell at him anymore, she wouldn’t laugh at him anymore. He was going to lose her and she would never come back.

Before he knew what he did he lied her down on her back and made her neck free. He didn’t hesitate anymore. He hesitated for far too long and if he would wait any longer he would really lose her. His lips touched her skin, his teeth pressed against her vain and eventually he bit and tasted the sweet blood. He swore himself it would be the first and the last time he would bite someone, but she was worth it and he wouldn’t go to heaven anyway. But he didn’t want to lose her.


End file.
